Ad Absurdum
by smokvica
Summary: This story will eventually turn into a Kol/Stefan one, I know the pairing may seem weird, but it will definitely rock your socks off! The ff will also focus on Mikaelson family interaction so it won't be only romantic/sexual in nature so it doesn't overwhelm the reader with repetitive drama. This is my first fanfic, so the structuring may be odd in the first few chapters. ENJOY!
1. Chapter 1

Kol was bored. But he shouldn't have been, right? It was a week after the ball, he had to catch up on so many things. One would think that after being kept in a coffin for so long, he'd find interesting things to do. But right now, he was too interesting in everything, and he had trouble deciding what to read first, what to do…where to focus? He was on information overload! It was tiring, it was confusing, it was maddening!

So he just tried to ignore unusual things as much as possible until he got used to the fact that he was now living in the twenty-first century. A world with showers, insanely fast cars, planes and yes...he even heard of space shuttles and people going to the moon! And of course, how could he not notice the other technological advances. It was amazing, really…the world had changed that much more in the hundred years he'd been in a coffin, than for the entire nine hundred odd years he'd spent roaming the world. His thoughts wandered again…

He was sitting in the living room, wondering where everyone was…there was no one to annoy now, so he got up and actively searched for any family member. The one he really meant o annoy though, was Klaus. He didn't deserve any peace from him, not for a long time anyways. Kol may have seemed to be on all right terms with his older brother, but he was definitely NOT fine with having had a century taken away from him. He'd missed the first and second World War, for heaven's sakes! That was just not acceptable! Not to mention, it hurt his ego…how could he have let that happen?

Never mind that now…he would make sure it was NEVER to happen again. Kol was walking around aimlessly for a while, how to even get around this mansion? It wasn't as big as some of the ones he used to own, goodness...what was with all his properties now?! Kol growled and decided it be best to go out and get a bite. He had ample time to explore all he's missed later anyways.

He wanted to leave town, but everyone had urged him to stay, some talk about family uniting coming from his mother. He rolled his eyes, how could they ever unite and be as one again? The woman was delusional! He sped out of the mansion and made his way to the Grill. It was truly…well, it was dull. This town really had boring people in it. He looked around wondering why on earth Klaus decided to build a mansion in this pitiful town. Of course they were all born here, but what was it now compared to the rest of the world? Nothing.

With that thought he compelled the barman a whole bottle of whiskey, he was going to need it to clear his thoughts. He poured himself the first glass and turned around to observe people interact with one another, strange. The women were definitely not as constricted as before, he noticed that earlier as well. The way they spoke was definitely more free, the way they dressed...definitely didn't leave as much to the imagination as before.

He couldn't say he was complaining, but it was too early for him to form an opinion on modern-day society. He didn't know which human seemed tastiest to him, it was really difficult to decide anything today! He sighed heavily, he was SO bored. Maybe a little mayhem wouldn't hurt? Elijah was going to kill him! He grinned brightly, yes, that would make everything more lively in the household! He made sure to lock all the exits to the Grill, whistling and humming merrily. Finally, some entertainment!

He got up on the counter, clearing his throat and holding the half empty whiskey bottle in his right hand. The fun was about to begin! He was all too giddy!


	2. Chapter 2

Stefan pulled up his 1963 Porsche Coupe to the curb and turned the ignition off. He sat there, his tight fingers clenching and unclenching the steering wheel. To say he was fuming...Was a riot. To say he was a sliver of a second from lashing out and tossing body parts and shredding out intestines was arguably more accurate, yet he sat there stubbornly, letting off steam and his muscles tensing with each crack of his knuckles. He exhaled quick and long, swearing at the end of it, and struck the wheel again, leaning back. His fuse was short.. To say the least.

He really was at the end of his wit. It wasn't even that, now he had no more coffins left to hold sway over Klaus, or that his plan to kill Klaus ultimately backfired, or that they were now at the mercy of three _un_-sleeping Originals, and their _un_-dead Witch Bitch of a mother, plus who knew where Mikael was?! It wasn't even that Damon made these deals with Elijah, behind his back, because who gave a shit anymore that his brother thought he was out of control and needed to be reigned in, while he made the moves on Elena, Stefan just didn't have the capacity to care anymore if Damon and Elena shacked up and had blue eyed epileptic babies, let them sex each other up. He was beyond indulging them with his stoic pauses and allowing a lingering silence to fill their lingering looks.. Sickening, but maybe he deserved it.

What no one realized... They were fading too fast for him to even acknowledge if he _cared_ if they realized or not.. As it was every time.. The rest faded, like tiny blinking lights one by one, more like they were drowned out, their radiance was dim and far away, and he came to understand this was what not caring felt, because he was not even bothered by it, with this removed blank canvas that he knew if they ever crossed his mental threshold. Not Damon, not Elena, certainly, and his need for revenge on Klaus had nothing to do with revenge whatsoever, as much as it stoked the hybrid's ego to think he was so much to blame for Stefan's 'falling off the wagon'.

It wasn't even the blood, he had a never ending thirst for it, and he knew it wouldn't be enough, it was never enough, no matter how many bodies he drained and how veins he tapped, his thirst was never sated.

It was the allure, the seductive taste that swelled in the mouth right before a kill, the gripping dance between a prey and its captor, the screams that are ripped from the throats he slashes into with delight, the blood flowing and pooling around the corpse.. How he yearned to prolong that moment where the life faded from the eyes, the gasping and guttural chokes, how the noises echoed in his ears for days.. A clash for life, the second right before its soul.. Is swept up in a frenzy, a moment that was frozen with the beating of his heart madly racing, a brilliance that shone and arrested his attention.. Way more than the ping ponging relentless shitty drama of triangles and stealing coffinsand pretending like Klaus was worth a damn or even if any of the Originals would rip his own head off for messing with them. That was just it; Stefan didn't need any catalyst to coax him to the vein, and definitely not Niklaus. He was his own bad influence, his own worst enemy.

It was always there.

He scoffed and messed up his hair, ruffling it then slowly shaping it back to how it was as he turned down the overhead mirror.. He really didn't need to worry about his hair, did he? If there was one thing that never gave him hell it was his hair. Bad hair days were very rare indeed.

So what to do now, he got out of his car and saw he was parked right in front of the Grill. Great, what a sight.. It never got old did it? Whatever he might as well get a drink. He swung the door open and strode right up to the bar, requesting a gin on ice. "A cold one.." He leaned against the bartop, shying his mossy green eyes down at first, then he swung them around without thinking. There were very many people around, however.. One face stood out almost instantly and incited his prompt distaste.. It was a face he saw only that night, one of the sleeping vampires that was now very much awake and peppy and smug and whistling away like he owned the joint, all the while looking devastatingly bored at he same time. Which one was he, Finn? No, Finn was the crazy one, Coal? Cole? Something with a C?

What the hell was he doing here?

Stefan made a noise of rising annoyance and turned away, the Original was just a few feet from him, merrily drinking whiskey, and Stefan's eyebrows met in the middle, this wasn't his town. Never a moment's peace in this damn hole without an Original constantly up his ass, and this one smirked too much and Stefan watched him from the corner of his eyes, he was getting up to leave. Thank whatever Viking God these Viking vampires heralded from, he sighed in relief. He guardedly watched Cole or Coal (and what the hell kind of name was that?) go to the door.. What the hell was he doing, not showing himself out that was for sure.. He was _locking_ the door. Each exit was locked, just fantastic.. He was now rotated around on the swiveling bar stools, wondering what the hell the older vampire had planned.. From the devious glint in his eyes, Stefan took a clear hint what was to come, it was obvious.. The vampire was standing on a table now, about to make an announcement. He held his breath and thought twice about making a run for it, to stay here and watch this massacre unfold, or..

Kol tapped the whiskey bottle with a knife, one that was sitting by the counter. Silly humans, didn't they know any better than to leave it out in the open for anyone to use? He tsked internally, and then his grin brightened as he looked around at all the faces. Some people looked curious, others bothered, and yet some anxious. Kol closed his eyes, listening to the beats of all those hearts! It was music to his ears, such a melody! All that blood…

He opened his eyes and searched for a person to fixate his gaze on, a petite redhead seemed an appropriate choice. Of course, he wasn't going to look just at her, but she was the focal point. She would be an example, the first to offer herself to him! Of course, look how she had dressed! She was practically naked in those shorts, which to Kol seemed more like an odd type of undergarment, and that tank top. People started getting antsy, then they started talking again, thinking he was merely another drunk man at the Grille. Kol finished his bottle and smashed it down on the floor, causing everyone to look at him again, this time more cautiously and definitely more nervously. The dark glint in his eyes radiating menace, very different from the way he was standing, completely at ease and relaxed as if he had no worries in the world. He winked at the girl and finally spoke.

"Dear citizens of Mystic Falls, I think it is only fair for me to introduce myself. I am Kol Mikaelson, many of you may know Niklaus, my _bastard_ brother." He made sure to emphasize the word bastard. He hated Klaus at this exact moment, it was all his fault! After a brief pause, he continued speaking. "Now, seeing how I missed all the fun and action of the century, I find it only fitting to begin my new adventures and explorations with a little celebration. You should be forever honoured that you are the chosen ones for the beginning of a new era!" People were mumbling, what was this mad man talking about, he was drunk, apparently…and what if he stabbed someone with that knife he was holding…the way he was holding it didn't look to reassuring. Kol's smirk widened when someone tried to approach him and carry him out. "Nuh uh, I wouldn't do that if I were you…" The man thought he was stronger than Kol, he certainly looked bigger. Kol shrugged and moved forward, stabbing the man in the stomach. Most people looked onward, shocked. Others screamed, mortified. Kol let out a chuckle, keeping the man down on his knees. "Now now, darling…it isn't nice to pout. "He smeared his blood over his lips. The blood didn't taste bad but…" No, no…not what I was looking for, I need something spicier, maybe the little redhead will do?" He looked at the girl now, she was trembling.

Other people moved forward, yelling he was crazy, they were calling the cops, he was a madman and a psycho, and they even held guns at him. Kol blinked in wonder. Did these people really think bullets would slow an Original down? Perhaps a millisecond, but not more. He quickly tore out the man's guts and decorated them around his neck, his fangs elongating finally. They all seemed shocked; didn't people know about vampires in this town? Ooops. "Oh dear, whatever have I done? I didn't even quench my thirst! "He decided he didn't want to wait any longer, he didn't want to play the games he usually played. He had waited a long time to just let go. He didn't care what anybody would say for this, he deserved a little boost in his system and he wasn't going to bow down to anyone, he didn't care anymore. He had paid enough. He looked around and noticed a familiar face, who was that man? He looked very grouchy, was it…oh yes, it was one of Klaus' lackeys, he was certain. He didn't pay any particular attention to him now, a lot was on his mind. Like how hungry he was…

He zoomed around, tearing hearts with his bare hands, ripping throats with his fangs, smashing skulls against the walls, all in a controlled frenzy. He HAD to let it out, all the rage, anger, pain he felt for his brother's utter lack of remorse for having carted him along like an object across the globe for a century! He stomped on someone's throat, crushing it. By now he didn't really know what he was doing, he only felt and tasted blood. Blood poured from out of his mouth, how many people did he drain? Was everyone here dead already? He let out a little whimper, where had all the fun gone?! He walked over to the girl, the only human to remain in one piece, and patted her head. She was crying and begging down on the floor now, what non-sense. Kol wiped his chin, it seemed his whole face and hair was covered in the thick red substance, as well as his clothes. "Excuse the mess, darling. I don't know where my manners went!" He laughed childishly, then he forced her to get up and looked at the man with striking green eyes. They were… "Hm, you seem hungry mate. Did Nik tell you to abstain?" He wiggled his forehead, this man seemed to be struggling based on the indent from overthinking too much in the middle of his eyebrows. He laughed again, the look on this man's face was priceless, where did Klaus find these people? Amusing. "Come on, go ahead…Oh, I see. You're afraid." He bit the girls' neck and licked the blood tracing down. "Mmm…eat her, that is an order. You're not going to turn down an Original, are you?" He eyed Stefan expectantly…"


End file.
